Category: April

I was able to go out to Utah for my Grandma’s funeral. It was a really nice weekend. My parents and Sherri were able to come as well and we all stayed with DeAnna. Friday evening there was a viewing. Except for my brother I think all of my extended family was there. My cousins Erin, Lisa, and Melissa made photo boards and displays of her life. Grandma looked very nice. A lot of my dad’s cousins and aunt and uncles were there too. After the viewing a lot of us practiced a song, Come Unto Me, written by Grandma to sing the next day at her funeral. My Grandpa sat on a chair by Grandma and talked with people as they came to see her. When he got there he put his hand on her chest and looked at her for a while then said, “Well Dear, you are cold and dead.” I think he was just being matter of fact, not funny or morbid.

The next morning we had the family prayer before the funeral. All seven of her children spoke at the service. They did a great job. The whole family sang her song, Families are Fun to Belong To. Some of us sang her song, Come Unto Me, and the closing song was a recording of her playing Danny Boy on her trumpet. She was an amazing woman. So kind, talented, and loving. My aunt Mary said that heaven had one of its best trumpeters back and she was probably already playing with the angels. I think she is too.

It was pretty chilly so the graveside service at the cemetery was brief. After my dad dedicated the grave, Grandpa was ready to go. There was a very nice lunch at the church. Her daughters sang another song of hers, To Mother. After the luncheon some people went home, a lot of us went to Grandpa’s house and visited and hung out together. He was exhausted and it had been a busy few weeks for him since Grandma had passed away so eventually he took a little nap. We had popcorn with raisins in it as a snack- one of his favorites. It was a very nice weekend. I enjoyed seeing family that I haven’t seen for a few years. Grandma will be greatly missed. She lived a great life and left an amazing legacy. There is an empty spot now that she isn’t with us physically anymore.

We have had some work done on our basement lately so I have been going through things and cleaning out closets and storage areas. I have never been attached to stuff. I have things that would make me feel sad to lose but for the most part if I don’t have a spot or a space for it I am all for getting rid of it or giving it to someone that can use it. My sentimental side is put into photos and journals.

So as I was cleaning things out and discarding things, one of the items that was left sitting in the middle of the floor was my blue rocking chair. This chair was purchased a few weeks before we had Matthew. I wanted a chair in his room to sit in when he nursed or at night for story time. At the time we bought this chair I really liked the look of the popular rocking chairs that had a matching rocking ottoman. We had looked at and tried several of that style, they were cute but when I sat in them I was less than impressed. They were not comfortable, they didn’t recline, and they were ridiculously expensive too. So other then looking cute in the nursery pictures at stores it seemed useless to me.

One of the weekends before Matthew was born Ryan and I were looking at couches at a store for our house in Wichita and noticed they had a room full of consigned furniture for sale. I walked through it and found this little blue reclining rocking chair. It was a smaller one so when I sat in it the arms were close and easy to reach and would work perfect to rest my arm on when holding a baby. It was cushioned everywhere so it was nice and comfy. It rocked, or could be reclined with a foot rest in many different angles. I pictures a nice little grandma or grandpa that had it in their home for a few decades. It was in really good condition and clean. I thought it was perfect! We bought it and brought it home and put it in Matthew’s room.

It worked perfectly for me over the years. I rocked and snuggled all my babies in it. It didn’t creek or make noise when you rocked in it. I read thousands of books, took hundreds of naps, and spent many nights comfortably sleeping in it with a sick baby or toddler sleeping on my chest. I thought about recovering it sometimes but never got around to it. It stayed in the youngest kids room up until we moved to our new house in 2015. In our new house we didn’t really have a spot for it but I put it in all of our kids rooms for awhile until they wanted to fill the space with something else. I even had it in my room for a bit. Then it ended up in the basement and Matthew spent countless hours in it when he broke his leg.

When we had the last of our built in work put in the basement I was all out of spots to put it. I moved it to the garage and it stayed there for a while. I asked around a bit with neighbors and friends and church to see if anyone wanted it. No takers. I loaded several other items and things in my van and donated them but kept leaving the chair in the garage. Finally I loaded the chair up in the van and drove it to the salvation army. Then I parked in the parking lot and debated with myself for way longer than I will admit if I should donate it or not. Then I called Ryan and ran my thoughts through him. I have no need for this chair…I seem to have some attachment to it…I feel hesitant to donate it…I am acting crazy about a chair…I want to donate it but I don’t want it to become a college kids pot smoking chair…I thought I knew what his answer would be but he surprised me. He told me that a few months ago he would have told me that I was being irrational and to donate the chair (that is the answer I was expecting) but after the last few months with discovering his biological family and dealing with buckets of unknown buried, new and overwhelming emotions he is a changed man now and understands that the chair is important to me and he will support me in keeping the chair or donating it. Whatever I wanted to do. Sweet answer, but not helpful.

I got off the phone with Ryan and talked out loud to myself in my car for a few minutes and decided I would donate the chair. I would hope someone that needed it would have it and my sweet chair would be useful to someone else, hopefully a new mom or grandparent…not a college student.

I drove up to the donation area, the man helping me said they only took furniture in really good condition. I told him the chair was in great condition, not a rip or stain on it. Someone would be very happy to have it, I rocked all my babies in it and I wouldn’t give it to him if he was going to throw it away or give it to a pot head. He put a hand on my shoulder and said he would find it a good home. Then I left and cried all the way home about a chair.

I know it wasn’t about the chair. The chair just reminded me of the memories I had with all my babies that aren’t babies anymore. It was one of the last if not the last thing I had around the house from their baby years. That man probably called me the crazy lady and gave the chair to the first person that wanted it, but I hope it found a good home.